Riley Rose: A Millennial Leader Gives Us Her Advice On Elections, Love, & LGBTQ+ Community

Apr 14, 2016
11 min read

With her daily hair color swaps, profile picture changes (gaining up to almost 600 likes at times), beaming smile, and booming voice emitting from a 5 ft 2 body frame, it's impossible to miss firecracker Riley Rose. Something that sets her apart from others however, is she uses her magnetism and popularity to aid in humanitarian causes. It's no surprise she landed an internship this upcoming summer working at Social Advocates For Youth. She's hilarious and a gem of a person, so naturally I had to pick at one of my best friend's brains for a bit and spread her wisdom with you:

Riley Rose On Leadership:

Why do you think you're seen as a leader in your community?

"Oh god is that true? Wow, I think maybe it’s because I'm enthusiastic and outspoken. I become vocal and abrasisive when voicing my opinion. I'm very passionate about social issues and maybe because of that people see that passion and enthusuiasm and get excited about it. On Facebook I’ll talk about politics and some of my followers aren't informed, so when they see that, we get into good discussions and enjoy having informative conversations. Regarding actual leader positions on paper, I co-led for 3 years my high school’s QSA club, I was a president for our class on Student Leadership Council, and I was Prom Chair on Prom Committee. I just like being able to know I'm making a difference and helping in any way. Personally, I identify as being apart of the LGBTQ+ community and I enjoy doing things currently at Chapman that spread awareness for my community. Like right now I'm working with my LGBTQ+ class to put on The Day of Silence."

What Advice Do You Have For People To Be Good, Effective Leaders?

"I think the first thing that makes a good leader is having passion. It's important to care about your cause, or organization, or whatever it may be. People look up to someone who has enthusiasum and love for whatever they're doing. Also, to be a good leader, always keep your mind open and allow yourself to continually be educated and informed. Have open ears to the ideas and suggestions of others. It's improtant to be benevolent rather than dictorial as a leader. Your job is to unify, so be inclusive with everyone and make a team effort as opposed to taking all the glory and rewards for yourself."

Riley Rose On Happiness, Confidence, Self Respect, And Relationships:

You’re notorious for brightening up peoples days just with your presence, what type of mindset do you have in life and your interaction with people that makes you so sunny and happy?

“Well first of all, wow! I'm so flattered, thank you! I think because I’ve been in such dark places in my life (I’ve battled anxiety and depression for a long time) so I know what it’s like to feel miserable, empty, lonely, numb, and worthless. I used to go days on end without feeling like I could ever smile again. Because I know what it’s like to feel miserable, I don’t want anybody to ever have to feel the way I did. After feeling the darkness of wanting to end it all, I’ve realized that I don’t ever want to feel that way again and that there's no room for that in my life anymore. I don’t want to feed that darkness my time or energy, I wont let it in. It’s important to me now to spread positivity and happiness, even when it’s difficult. You never know who’s going to need it most. That’s why I choose to see all the joy and sunshine I can in life and I am constantly working on sharing that! Also, to put it quite plainly, making people laugh is kind of the best feeling in the world!”

What's the best advice you have for people struggling with their self confidence?

"Realizing that this is the only body and life you have so life's too short not to make the most of it and love it. I’ve had A LOT of issues with my self confidence and it’s still an every day struggle. But when I’m out here doing what I love to do, knowing that I'm able to make a difference to people, even just making them smile, it's really difficult for me to not love myself for that. Not to sound cliche, but all bets are that you're really awesome just the way you are. I think a lot of self confidence issues can stem from comparison to others and then letting it affect how you view yourself in a negative way. But once you realize that it's really just apples and oranges, it makes life easier. Sure, maybe there is things that someone else may have that you don’t, but you also need to realize that you have things that they wish they could have too! The best thing you can do is embrace and learn from each other and in return you better yourself. That's what I’ve done and it's worked wonders for me! And like I said before, to anyone out there struggling, you are awesome! Life’s too short so be the best version of you and do what you love! Just remind yourself that you’re a rockstar and there isn’t a damn thing wrong with you. That’s been a hard truth for me to swallow but it’s so important. Embrace your quirks, flaws, and imperfections, it's what makes you-you. If anyone reading this ever needs a pep talk or cheer up, feel free to come find me. There are such amazing things about everyone and I’m happy to remind you about them!"

How can someone gain respect back for themselves?

"I've definitely had trouble with self respect in the past and still do. Love yourself and trust that whatever decisions in life you make, it's the right choice for you and those choices are always yours to make. I think once I realized that, I've been able to pick up the pieces from there. Also, doing what makes me happy and respecting the fact that I'm doing that helps build self respect. No matter how technically 'successful' you may be in some areas, in the other areas make sure you're still trying your hardest. There's no one path anyone's supposed to go down, so whatever path you're on, you're on it for a reason and you need to respect that journey's process. Make the most of it, do what makes you happy, I know that definitely helped me to love and respect myself more."

You've witnessed and been through difficult relationships, what advice do you have for anybody that wants to be in a relationship, yet the people they continually fall for treat them with disrespect

"Well I've definitely experienced some crap in relationships, both big and small and it really sucks. Since I've always been very sensitive and trusting, it's been easy to fall for the same stupid crap. I used to think someone dating me and treating me with respect would be impossible. It’s really easy to dismiss people and assume the worst after awhile; but as cliche and naive as it sounds, it’s really important to keep your heart open (but not TOO open). It’s finding a balance between allowing yourself to be vulnerable around people even if you're afraid but also not being TOO trusting, as I've found I've too often done in the past. Also, just knowing what qualities in somebody that has hurt you before and being able to identify those off the bat with someone else. Be cautious, definitely, but don't be afraid to be vulnerable and keep your heart open to any possibilities (god that sounds so stupid and cliche). I'm in a really awesome relationship right now with a boy I love who loves me back and who's my best friend, he’s incredible to me and I feel so lucky. The vulnerability and caution paid off!"

Riley Rose On Her Famous Father, Following Dreams, And Career:

Your dad, Thomas Smothers (Smothers Brothers), is famous. Did you feel like you've lived in his shadow or do you feel like you've been motivated to create your own sense of identity and individual career?

"I want to go into comedy some day, there are definitely ways in which my relation to my dad could either help me or hurt me and I’ve thought about this a lot. As I’ve grown older and into my own person; I’ve realized It’s silly to look at who my dad is to be a negative thing in any way. He did some really groundbreaking things back in the 60’s. He was outspoken, passionate, and unapologetic about really important political and social issues and fought against censorship-all while making people laugh! Why would I not celebrate that? I used to be embarrassed when people would bring up the fact that my dad was famous, regardless of whether or not they knew who he was; I felt like it’s all people focused on and that no one actually cared about who I was. Eventually I realized that I shouldn’t be embarrassed, I should be proud! And I am! He's my biggest hero, what he’s done with his career is exactly what i’m passionate about: making people laugh, speaking out on social and political issues, and all in all making a change. I now wear my relation proudly like a badge and whether it may hurt me or help me in my career, I know that’s not up to me. How other people or future employers choose to react, I don’t have power over that. So all I can do is choose how I decide to present that part of my life. I’ve decided to do it with pride. I love that I can look up to my dad as a role model for what I want to do with my life and I know he supports me, which means the world to me. I think I only lived in his shadow (and still occasionally still do live) only when I let myself. I have the power over how to deal with it, and I think I’ve had no trouble establishing my own sense of identity. Him being my dad and who he is is a part of that identity, and I choose to embrace it!!"

You decided to follow your dreams, many people our age, older, and younger are struggling with that. What did you do and tell yourself so you could make dream catching happen?

"Life’s too short to not do what you want to do or at least try. I’m not really sure how successful I am but I like to think I’m doing okay so far. There’s definitely still a lot of steps to achieving my dreams but i'm trying in small ways. That’ s what I remind myself is that it’s a process and there’s no ‘one path’ to get there. I remind myself that I'm doing it my own way and as long as I'm happy in it, that’s what matters. I just truly don’t feel there’s any time to waste not doing what you love! I understand sometimes it’s really difficult, whatever your dreams may be and seem unattainable, but why would you want to spend any minute of your life doing anything else? That’s pretty much just the way I look at it. I’m really excited to see what the future holds!"

Riley Rose On LGBTQ+, Homophobia, And Politics:

For people that are homophobes, where can you empathize with them and what do u recommend for them to get over their fears?

“It’s very difficult for me to empathize with somebody homophobic, or a racist, or a sexist, whatever it may be. It’s especially hard since I had a really tough experience coming out as bisexual myself, which resulted in being bullied, ostracized, and harassed and in turn being ashamed of who I was for years. Regardless, in my heart of hearts I try to give people the benefit of the doubt and assume it’s just coming from a place of ignorance and a lack of education. I try to use those situations and individuals as an opportunity to educate and inform and hopefully their minds will change. Sometimes people are just shi**, plain and simple. When it gets down to it, I think to get over their "fears" (it’s not a fear though, to me you’re just an asshole), just education, education, education. It can help but it really does come from a place of ignorance more often than not. While I may seem positive and upbeat about the topic, I do have an issue with people who lack respect and compassion for others. It's taken me awhile to be able to be in this mindset and even now it can still be trying.”

What first steps should large corporations and businesses take to ensure people of all genders and sexual orientation feel at home and safe?

"I think the first steps to that are pretty simple; The first step is creating an environment of employees who, to put it frankly, aren't assholes. You need a safe environment and I think that needs to begin by not having people in that business be prejudiced or discriminatory. It’s also very important that people are being hired fairly as well, no matter what their gender, race, sexual orientation, etc; may be. Equal opportunity everywhere is REALLY important. Having a safe space training is really important as well. That is something we do at my school which is described as ‘An initiative to educate allies who support LGBTQ individuals in our campus community.’. Even though it's just mostly for youth and campus settings, I think its really important to extend out to workplaces and businesses (which I’m sure already exists and I’m sure I just sound silly). Also, things like gender neutral bathrooms are very important so everybody can feel safe and comfortable no matter their gender identity."

What's your input regarding the gender identity bathroom controversy?

"About the bathroom controversy, it shouldn’t even be a controversy. It’s stupid that people are trying to police other people's gender identities; I think they know better than you do about who they are. I also don’t think we realize the privilege we have as identifying as cisgender, something we don’t even need to think about (ie: using a public restroom). It’s so simple and something we take for granted, but nobody should have to feel like something such as using the bathroom needs to be an issue. Everybody should be able to feel safe and comfortable and be able to go about their lives. I think what needs to happen is, for one, like I said, people to stop policing and make assumptions about other peoples gender identities in that situation (also in general) as well as implementing more gender neutral bathrooms. Gender neutral bathrooms have been implemented a lot more recently, which is awesome, in a lot of public places, campuses, government buildings, etc. I think everywhere needs to follow suit so nobody should have to feel stressed out about which restroom to use. It should be a right not a privilege! And don’t get me started on the idiocy of the gender binary, gender is just a social construct and the fact that we act like "men" and "women" are the ONLY genders is ludicrous!! It’s so stupid!! But I digress. Basically, we need transphobic people to stop trying to tell others where they can and cannot go to the bathroom. It’s a free country isn’t it?"

What's the best advice you have for all the people running for president this year?

"I really dont have any experience in politics, but I try to keep myself informed to some degree and follow the election. My advice for the politicians running is dont be an asshole. Also, fight for everyone. not just the 1%, or the elite, or white people, or straight people, etc. EVERYBODY'S rights matter. To the women running for any political office, I say give the boys hell. To any openly LGBTQ+ individuals running for office, GIVE THEM HELL. For any POC, give. them. hell! To the GOP, have compassion and learn to respect EVERYONE'S civil rights, not just yours. Everyone running should keep unapologetically being you in a space where you might get discriminated against. It can be tough when a lot of politicians nowadays are old crusty white dudes who dont give a crap about anyone but themselves and their bank accounts. I'm excited to see political offices all over the country diversify. Oh also, another word of advice for anyone running for office: STOP TRYING TO CONTROL MY BODY. Stop trying to control my uterus. My p****, my choice. My body my voice!"